“white liquid in a bottle has to be milk”

“can’t see a priest on top of a mountain of sugar”

“not mind games but facts”

Anything else you guys can think of? I’m running out of ideas. And I think Roy Hodgson is going to hit me with a witty English comeback and I’m afraid of getting served. Some metaphor that will defend my acquisition of Robbie Keane and Alberto Aquilani would be good.